Love is blind
by JeniluvzBones
Summary: Brennan says yes to Sully's marriage proposal. Can Booth stop Brennan from making the biggest mistake of her life, or is love too blind to see that they belong together? Plenty of angst. BB. Rated M for a reason.
1. Breaking the news

**Hey, this is my attempt at an angsty fic. Contains smut, so those who aren't into that should not read this fic! For this chapter, underlined words are the present, italics are the past. Please R&R!**

You stared at yourself in the full length mirror in the spare room of Hodgins' mansion. You were alone, staring blankly at the mirror, your mind riddled with thoughts you shouldn't have and memories you regretted.

_You went to his apartment. You knew it was a bad idea, but he was the one person you needed to talk to, the one person who you could rely on._

_He answered the door, smiling as he saw you, until his mind processed your grim expression._

"_Bones? Are you okay?"_

_You didn't even know yourself, so what could you say? "May I come in?" you asked, that being the only safe thing to say at the time._

_He opened the door widely and you strolled in, turning to face him, but finding yourself unable to look him in the eyes._

Your eyes were glassy with tears which were already starting to stain through your veil. You never thought that this day would come, and you felt... something ever since he got down on one knee. Was it love? Because if so, love would be severely overrated. It felt more like...fear. 

_He asked you again what was wrong; and you felt yourself shaking as you looked up at him. You could feel your shoulders tense once you saw the genuine concern in his eyes. You opened your mouth, but closed it again, fearing whatever you said next would hurt him._

_But he kept pushing. He asked if it had to do with work, family, or friends. Was it because of your father? Did something happen when you went to Uganda? His next question was the one that hit home._

"_Did something happen between you and Sully?" Something in your eyes must have given you away, because he kept the topic on Sully. "Look, I know you might be upset that he left, but he came back. Sully's a great guy and I know that you-"_

"_He proposed," you interrupted. You saw his face fall, his jaw dropping before he said "Oh" quietly. _

"_That, that's great, Bones."_

_Was it great? Did you really want to do this? "Yeah," you replied, unable to think of anything else._

"_So, you said yes?" he asked. You could see the hurt in his eyes. Was it hurt? Maybe it was just what you wanted to see. Maybe you wanted to see the same sorrow and fear that you felt._

"_Yeah," you repeated again. It seemed as though you had lost all other vocabulary at the time._

You glanced down at your dress, a white, frilly, puffy concoction adopted by the sanctity of marriage; something that you would usually never be seen dead in. Angela assured you earlier that you looked great. Ironic, since you didn't feel all too great.

_You were both sitting on the couch in silence, drinking beer as a 'celebration.' You kept on stealing glances of your partner, who at the moment, you were concerned about. Booth hated silence, yet he was quite content to sit down and take occasional swigs of his beer, acting completely oblivious to his partner, as if she wasn't here. You asked him if he was okay, and he looked at you, faking a smile and asking you why he wouldn't be okay. You didn't answer; you just looked away, hating the awkward silence. Your gaze flickered over towards him again. His smile was gone, and he had a look in his eye. You had only ever seen that look once before, and that is when he told you that you should sail away with Sully. Hating the silence, you asked him again if he was okay and told him not to deny it because she knew something was wrong._

You looked back up at your face. Your hair was pulled back neatly and your eyes were starting to turn red. If only you could stop remembering that night.

_He scrubbed his face with his hands and told you to drop it. He stood up and took your empty beer bottle out of you hand, then started walking to the kitchen._

_You walked into the kitchen behind him, and you told him that you weren't going to drop it. You watched his head drop down and his hands grasp the sides of the sink tightly, before he swung around to face you. You started to back up as he approached you, growing uncomfortable by his intense stare. You gasped when you felt the cold counter on your back, and you felt trapped as he got closer and closer. Your noses were almost touching by the time he stopped._

"_I can't do it, Bones," he said quietly, his eyes filled with a mixture of anger and hurt. He must have read the confused expression on your face, because he clarified his statement._

"_What do you want me to tell you, that I'm happy for you? That he deserves you? That he would be able to make you happy? Come on, Bones. You and I both know that if I said that, I'd be lying."_

_Your confusion was quickly replaced by anger. "Okay, so what's your alternative, Booth? Because I'd really love to hear it," you said loudly. When he didn't respond, you continued. "What the hell makes you think you know me well enough to know what's best for me?"_

"_I know you more than he does!" he shouted. "I know that when you're sick, you like to wear you sweatshirt because it makes you more comfortable. I know that when you're sad, you like to listen to blues music. I know that you only bought a new TV so as you could watch the new remake of 'The Dukes of Hazard.' I know that when you furrow your brow when looking at remains, it's a signal for everyone to shut up. I know that you hate Stephen King novels, and that you consider red roses to be a cliché that has absolutely lost all sentimental value. But most of all, I know when you are settling for second-best. Don't get me wrong, Sully's great, but he's not the guy for you and we both know it," he said harshly._

The tears finally spilled down your eyes at this memory. How did he know all this? How did he know you so well?

"_Then who, Booth? You?" you scowled. "You drew that line a long time ago. You made it pretty clear that you didn't want me; that you didn't care for me..."_

_Your speech was cut short by him pounding his hands loudly on the counter either side of you, effectively trapping you._

"_Don't you dare!" he growled. "You can deny what we have all you want, but don't you dare say that I don't care about you." You looked in his eyes. Behind all of the anger, you could see that he was sincerely hurt by your accusation. Something came over you, seeing him like this. He did care about you; you knew that, but this...whatever you were feeling right now was dangerous, but unstoppable._

_You grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his face that extra few inches into an intense, passionate kiss. After a second, you felt his arms wrap around your waist and pull your body to him. Your tongue was instantly in his mouth, sliding against his. You felt him grab your hips and pick you up, so you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist and started undoing his tie, all the while unwilling to break the kiss. You felt him move, walk; and you knew exactly what was going to happen. You knocked over a few things on your way, but your back eventually came into contact with the softness of the bed; or the couch, you couldn't tell at the time. All you were concentrating on was his hands sliding your top up further. You groaned when he reached your breasts, arching your back as he ran his thumbs over your nipples. Sudden realisation didn't kick in until both of you had your clothes off, and he was kissing your neck; silently requesting what you both needed so badly._

_When he entered you, he groaned and you let out a noise between a moan of pleasure and a cry of sorrow. You felt the tears spilling from your eyes as he desperately latched his lips onto yours. You hated him so much at this moment, until you felt him shaking, and realised that you were now not the only one sobbing in anguish._

_He started to move, pumping himself slowly in and out, and you raised your hips to meet him. You were frustrated at his pace. You didn't want him to go slow. Right now, you felt that sentiment would make this more complicated, and the only justification of your actions would be if there were no _

_emotions involved. You quickened your pace, whimpering at the feel of him inside you, and he got the message, going faster._

_You buried your face in his neck, kissing furiously. You couldn't let him see your face. He was good at reading you; he would know that you didn't think of this as a quick fuck, but you couldn't stop the tears and sobs. For some reason, you felt reassured that he was crying too, but at the same time you hated him for showing his emotions._

_When you threw your head back in pleasure, he kissed your neck hard. You felt as if he had the same problem as you; that he was trying to hide his emotions. You squeezed your eyes shut, the tears still escaping and drenching your face._

_Your erratic moans mixed with your sobs, and you were too busy thinking about your lack of morals that it came as a surprise when wave after wave of spasms hit you body hard. In the midst of your orgasm, you felt him joining you, spilling inside you. His cries were as loud as yours, and he rested his forehead on yours, closing his eyes and breathing as hard as you._

_When you finally regained your ability to breathe, you panicked. You felt cheap, dirty, and unfaithful. You pressed your palms to his shoulders, pushing him slightly as an indicator for him to roll off of you._

"_No, Temperance, please," he pleaded, his voice still heavy with sobs. He anxiously latched his lips onto yours. He must have known that if he let you leave, you would go back to Sully. Even the thought of that made you guilty, but you committed to him, and you broke it. The only rational thing to do would pretend that you never wound up in Seeley Booth's bed._

"_Seeley," you sobbed softly, pushing him away from you. He rolled off you reluctantly and you immediately stood up and gathered all of your clothes, wriggling into them quickly. He dressed too, and as you hurried out of the bedroom door, you felt his hand on your arm._

_You turned around to tell him to let go, but he spoke first._

"_I love you," he said in a low voice, his eyes still shining with tears. Fresh tears slid down your cheeks, and you shrugged out of his grip and hurried out the door..._

"Bren?" Angela opened the door and you quickly wiped the tears from your eyes. She looked at you and said "They're ready for you."

"Okay, I'll be right out," you said.

"Sweetie?"

"Yeah?"

"Sully's a really nice guy," she said definitively.

"I know," you replied.

"Sometimes it's harder to hurt the feelings of a good guy because-"

"Angela!" you interrupted bluntly. You didn't need yet another lecture on why you shouldn't marry Sully, not now.

She left the room and you turned to face the mirror once again, taking a deep breath before going out to make the biggest commitment of your life.


	2. Love hurts

**Okay...chapter two. Kind of went back in time for this one to Booth's reaction of the next day after being with Brennan. I thought it would add to the angst, which is the theme for this story. Thank you to everyone who commented, it's nice to know my work is appreciated. I feel special!**

**Love hurts: Second person Booth**

You entered the Jeffersonian as if it were any other day. As if you hadn't told your engaged partner that you loved her after you had made love to her last night. As if it didn't break your heart to know that she went home to him. Your friend. A guy you actually respect as a person, but you know will never make her as happy as she deserves to be. No, as far as anyone else knows, it's just another day.

You swiped your card in order to access the platform. "Where's Bones?" you asked, impatient to see her.

"She's taking today off!" said Angela. "Did you hear the news?" she asked excitedly.

Yeah, you heard it. Her words still rang through your ears along with her cries of ecstasy and grief. "Yeah," you answered, not meeting Angela's excited look. That damn artist must have read your misery, because her gaze softened. "She's going to meet her brother and Dad and tell them," she said softly.

"Okay," you said quietly. She walked past you with a sympathetic grin, patting your shoulder pitifully before leaving.

Cam walked up to the platform, and upon seeing your face, said "Oh...You've heard the news?"

You looked up at her, trying to hide your moping face. "You mean about Bones and Sully? Yeah, it's...I'm...I'm happy for them," you said pathetically. She offered you a tight-lipped smile before getting to work, rendering the lab as an area of awkward silence. You realised that you had no business to attend to in the lab, so you decided to leave. Upon your descent down the stairs, you heard Angela tell Hodgins "She must have celebrated her engagement a lot yesterday with Sully, because when I saw her this morning, she had love bites all over her neck!"

Yeah right; as if Sully would even know what to do with a woman like Temperance. You bitterly knew that they were _your_ marks on her neck, from when you branded her as your own on the best and worst night of your life. A lot of use that did, she still just skipped on home to that bastard.

You left the Jeffersonian. As you got into the SUV, her scent surrounded you, as if she was there in the passenger's seat; but alas, you were alone.

You entered your office in the Hoover building, and your jaw almost hit the floor at the sight before you. Sully sat there, in your chair, smiling goofily at you. Of course, he took your woman, so it why not take your chair as well.

"Did she tell you yet?" he asked enthusiastically.

You faked a smile. "Yeah man. Congratulations!"

"Thanks. She went to sleep at Angela's yesterday, and she left to tell her family today, so I actually didn't see much of her since I proposed. Listen, I've got a question to ask you...Will you be my best man?"

Your eyes widened. You most definitely were not expecting that. Your long silence must have given something away, because he asked you if you were okay. Of course you weren't okay. There was a huge difference between knowing that your friend was marrying the love of your life, but it was another to be part of the ceremony. The thought alone made you sick.

"Um...yeah I'm fine...it's just...wow."

"I know, but you've always been a good friend and I know it will mean a lot to Brennan," he said smiling. "So...?"

Your mouth could only pronounce "Um's" and "eh's" as you stood there, foolishly trying to come up with anything to get you out of it.

"I knew it!" Sully exclaimed.

"Knew what?" you asked. Sure, now you could talk.

"You know, at first I thought you just had a thing for her, but you actually have feelings for her, don't you?"

You swallowed thickly, unable to answer. You could see Sully's face getting angrier and his voice straining to stay calm.

"You know what Booth? Too bad! You had your chance; you've had four years to do something about it," Sully was glaring at you angrily, but there was also a certain insecurity there, as if he knew you were a threat. "Don't you think I deserve a chance with her?"

You could tell he was trying to sound angry, but it just sounded like he was pleading for you to back off. You wanted to tell him no; that you don't think he even deserves to breathe the same air as her, let alone get to touch her, to taste her, and to spend the rest of his life with her. But you knew that if you said that, Brennan would never forgive you.

Sully glared at you and you returned his glare with a stone-cold look. After a while, he finally spoke.

"Never mind, Booth; I don't want you at the Wedding." He turned around and left you in the office, angrier than you ever remembered.

Charlie came into your office, whistling a tune to himself.

"Hey Booth; Sully told me the news, tell Dr. Brennan congrats from me next time you see her, will you?" He hadn't looked up from the file he was holding, so he had no idea of the rage burning in your eyes.

"We have a new lead on the victim. Apparently, her boyfriend came back to town and...You know what, I'll just give you the file," he finished, finally looking up and hurriedly handing you the file. He left quickly and you heard him say "Dude, don't go in there...he's just heard about his partner," to 

somebody outside your office. There was a whisper of "Oh shit!" before you heard two sets of footprints leaving.

Your blood was boiling and you were shaking both with anger and the fear of losing her. Your hands were curled up into fists and your breath was getting shallow. Your sudden need to destroy...something came into your head, and the next thing you knew, everything on the desk was sent flying across the room, landing hard on the floor.

Cullen walked in. If it were any other day, you'd be scared shitless of the look on his face, but right now you didn't give a fuck.

"WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH YOU BOOTH?" he screamed.

You walked by him, out of your office, muttering "I'm taking the day off" behind you. You could hear him calling you back, but you kept walking, shooting dirty looks to whoever looked into your eyes as if they understood what you were going through. As if they'd even have the slightest idea of knowing what it was like for you. All you knew is that one way or another, this wedding was not going to happen. Not if you have any say in it...

**Dun dun duuuuuuun! Next up is the wedding. Just to let you know that it is an anthropological inevitability that chapters go up faster when reviews come in greater supply...so if you've read this chapter, PLEASE comment. It's basic courtesy.**


	3. Don't do it

**I know it took me a while, soz. I have a new job so my time here is very limited. It might take me a while to get another chapter up, but I will.**

**Don't do it: Third person**

She walked slowly towards her father, who looked awe-struck, murmuring kind words of her beauty. She gave a half-convincing smile before he asked if she was ready. She took a deep breath before nodding.

"Tempe, are you sure you want to go through-"

"Ugh, Dad! Don't start. Not now," you stated, fed up with everyone asking 'Are you sure?' 'Sully's great, but is he right for you?' and 'What does Booth have to say about it?' She was getting sick of everyone mentioning Booth. If Booth really gave a fuck, he would have at least tried to contact her, or say _anything _in the three months it took to plan the Wedding. Pretty fast timing; Sully 'didn't want to wait.' Sully also gave the usher a picture of Booth so as he wouldn't 'pop in.' But since she hasn't heard from Booth since the night of her engagement, she was pretty sure there wasn't much to worry about.

Didn't he even care for her? She had sworn that he was sincere when he told her that he loved her; maybe it hurt him too much when she didn't say it back. Maybe he was just respecting her wishes for him not to interfere. But still, she had thought that their partnership was worth more than that, so why didn't he stay as her partner instead of letting Sully take his place?

It didn't matter now... The guests were waiting, Sully was at the alter and the bridesmaids were almost up the aisle completely. All that was left was for her to walk up, exchange vows and spend the rest of her life with Sully. Sully...not Booth.

She walked slowly with her father, listening to whispers of 'she's beautiful!' and 'Oh my God, she's going through with it!' and 'where's Booth when you need him?' She looked at Sully, who was beaming at her. She attempted to smile back, but realised that he would be unable to see through her veil anyway.

When she got to the alter; the judge asked "who gives this woman?"

"Well, actually, Tempe doesn't believe in the implication of being property; but then again she didn't believe in the sanctity of marriage either. Well, in either case, no. I don't give you this woman."

There were a couple of gasps and Brennan glared at her father. "DAD!"

"Sorry, Tempe! You know I love you; I'm just following orders," he said, before picking her up so as she was sitting on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her legs so as she couldn't struggle.

"Dad, what the hell are you doing?" she shouted. Sully was about to follow them, but Russ and Hodgins stood in front of him. She looked back at his confused expression, and heard Hodgins say "Sorry Dude, but she needs to talk to him."

Her eyes widened in realisation. "Dad, Please" she pleaded. "Don't do this. Please. I don't want to talk to him. Dad! PUT ME DOWN!" she screamed as they left the room.

"You need to be 100 percent sure before you marry Sully," he stated.

"I am sure, Dad. I am."

"Then you won't mind having a chat with _him_, will you?"

"YES I WILL!" she screamed.

He opened the door into yet another room in Hodgins' place. It appeared to be another bedroom. He put her down and he exited, closing the door behind him. She wasn't fast enough to exit with him and when she tried to open the door, she realised that it was locked.

She huffed angrily before turning around and seeing Booth in the far corner, looking at her. Her eyes softened for just a second before she went back to an icy glare.

"This sure as hell better be important!" she said coldly. He started walking over to her and she felt a shiver up her spine when she realised how intensely he was looking at her.

"Wow, Ange wasn't kidding about how you look in the dress," he said. He stopped right in front of her and took the slide that was holding her veil to her head out and discarded it on the floor.

"Booth, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"I'm saving you from making the biggest mistake of your life. You should show a little gratitude!"

She glared at him. "I don't want to be saved. I don't _need_ to be saved, Booth. And you know, you could have at least _tried _to have this conversation with me before the day of the Wedding," she knew that tears were starting to glaze her eyes, but she didn't even care anymore.

"Hey I tried. I really did. But you do know that your boyfriend put a restraining order out on me, since he'd have to tell you if he wanted to put one against me seeing you. I can't be anywhere near him. And since you spend all of your time with him, I can't be near either of you; which is why I'm here. I'm a safe distance from _him _whilst being able to talk to _you,_" he said, his tone then shifted from pride to sadness. "I've tried to talk to you Temperance; but you ran. We made love, and you _ran_. I told you that I loved you and you ran. You have no idea how torn up I was over that." He scrubbed his face with his hands and he took a deep breath.

"You regretted being with me and I never felt worse in my life. I knew you were getting married. God, there were so many times when if I had have kissed you, it would have been safer. But no, I chose your engagement night." He pinched the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes tightly in frustration. Brennan decided against telling him that it was her who kissed him. She couldn't show sympathy or she felt that she might lose herself, just like she did the night they made love for the first time.

"Listen Booth. I kind of have somewhere I'm supposed to be, so if you're done with your speech-" he cut her off by dropping a kiss on her lips. This one was much less urgent than the one they shared three months ago; and it was so much sweeter. He felt her kissing him back, and he thanked God or Buddha or whoever the hell was up there for letting him taste her sweet, soft lips.

When he broke the kiss, she looked up at him with shock etched on her face.

"I tried to leave you alone. I tried to convince myself that you wanted to marry him; that he might make you happy after all. I couldn't do it, Temperance. I couldn't sit back and pretend that I didn't care. Pretend that it doesn't make me sick to think of him kissing you; touching you. Temperance, I swear...if I thought that you could be truly happy with him, then I'd have left you alone." His voice was now pleading with her to understand. She pursed her lips and she closed her eyes once she felt his thumb brush away a tear that slid down her cheek.

He kissed her again, briefly. His lips barely brushed against hers before he pulled away, looking to see her reaction.

She sighed deeply and looked into his sepia brown eyes. "I'm gonna have to talk to Sully."

**Let me know what you think! You know the drill. Push button. Write opinion. Not that difficult!**


	4. Liars and telltales

**Oh, people, people, people. You thought that this chapter would give you fluff and romance. Well, I'm a little too cruel for that. Beware of angst for a few more chapters at least. I'm not ready for the despair to end just yet!!**

**Liars and tell-tales:1st person Brennan**

I asked Booth to leave the room. Asked him to wait somewhere else while I spoke to Sully in here. He nodded and told me he'd be just a few doors down in the parlor if I needed anything. With that, he gave me one last slow, sweet kiss that made my toes curl and my heart-rate increase considerably. He walked out, turning to give me a small tight-lipped smile before closing the door behind him.

I took a deep breath and opened the door, asking Max to send for Sully. He gave a smile which was dangerously close to being smug, but he cut it out at my warning glance. He walked away and I closed the door, awkwardly sitting, and then standing, and then pacing until Sully finally entered the room.

The look on his face told me that he already knew what this was about. He approached me and put his hand on my arm.

"Temperance please. Don't let him come between us. Please don't do this. We can work through it, I promise," he said softly.

I shook my head softly. "Sully, this is unfair to you. You don't deserve this. You deserve someone who'll love you unconditionally and who'll never have to think twice about….going away with you and getting married. I can't give that to you, and I'm sorry, but a working marriage needs at least that."

"This isn't about that Tempe, and you know it. This is about him. You wondered why I didn't want him here? Why I didn't want him around you? It doesn't take a genius to know that he wants you. I've seen how he looks at you like you're a piece of meat and he's a predator. It's also clear that what he wants is only skin-deep. But us Tempe; God you already know that we're so good together. I mean, if there's anyone in the world you can trust, it's me."

The ending of his little speech is what really made my blood boil. "Oh really? Because I'm pretty sure that putting a restraining order on Booth BEHIND MY BACK is kind of a violation of the whole 'trust' analogy," I spat angrily.

His brows also furrowed in anger at my outburst. "Yeah? He told you about that huh? I bet he just 'accidentally' left out the part where he decked me."

My uptight body loosened, and my eyebrows rose in shock. _Yes, as a matter of fact he did fail to mention that little tidbit._

Sully emphasized his point by raising his shirt. There were a couple of faded bruises at his ribs. "Marks are still there, after all these months. But you wouldn't know, would you? You don't even look at me anymore when we make love. What are you doing, huh? Thinking about him? Thinking about the night you spent with him? OUR ENGAGEMENT NIGHT?" he bellowed.

_Shit._ My eyes went even wider as I looked from his ribcage to his eyes, which were burning with anger.

"You think I didn't fucking know huh? You think I didn't notice the hickeys on your neck that sure as hell weren't from me? Think I didn't realize the look he gave you when you told him you were assigning me as a partner, as if he fucking lost his little playboy bunny for good? Don't you realize that that's all you are to him? One incredibly good fuck that he wants another piece of. Well, you go have your happily ever after with him, but just don't come back to me when he gets bored of your tricks."

The fury rose in me and I felt an uncontrollable urge to pick up a blunt object and hit him hard with it. I probably would have if Max didn't come bursting in through the door and take one hell of a swing for Sully. When the blow didn't quite knock him down, Max grabbed him by the neck and pinned him against the wall.

"Don't you _ever_ fucking talk to my daughter like that again you son of a Bitch," he snarled.

I immediately ran over, grabbing Max's forearm and pulling it from Sully's neck.

"Dad, get out!" I shouted.

He looked at me, fury softening as he released Sully from his grip.

"If he gives you any hassle-"

"He won't," I interrupted. "He's just leaving."

Sully looked at me again. "You know what the really big hinter was when you cheated on me? The fact that a few days later, Booth told me. Started bragging about how he got you on your back even though we were together," he sneered, his expression slightly smug as he seen the surprise in my face. Happy with the fact that my love-life was now as fucked up as his, he stormed out the door, slamming it behind him.

I just stood there, dumbfounded for a while. Booth wouldn't do that; he wouldn't. He cares about me. But then again, Sully knew. Logically, Sully could have figured out on his own, but why would he pretend not to know for three months and then lie about Booth telling me?

I snapped out of it once Max put his hand on my shoulder. "Are you alright, Sweetie?" he asked tenderly.

I turned around quickly to face him. Right now, he was the only person I could vent my anger on.

"What the hell gave you the right to listen in, let alone barge in here," I spat furiously, causing Max to take a couple of steps back.

His eyes went wide. "Whoa, Tempe, I was just trying to help, like a good father-"

"Well you're sixteen years too fucking late for that," I snarled, before barging past him and out the door.

I walked straight past Russ, who was calling me back, supposedly concerned. But right now, I had somewhere else to be.

I practically ripped the door from its hinges and found Booth there, looking at me with a surprised expression. "Bones?"

"WHAT THE FUCK GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO TELL HIM THAT WE SLEPT TOGETHER?" I bellowed.

**Don't hate me just yet. Save the hate for the next chapter, and the one after that, and maybe the one after that too! Please review. Maybe seeing all the feedback would help my imagination be a little less cruel. Maybe.**


	5. Explinations

**I was thinking of leaving this story to rest after this chapter, but decided against it because I know all of you want a fluffy ending. But just remember that it may take a long time to achieve that.**

I looked at her in shock. How did I not expect him to tell her? Even as she shouted at me, the memory came flashing through my mind.

FLASHBACK:

_Sully came into my office; barged in more like. He had a file in one hand and Brennan's cell-phone in the other. It had been three days since he asked me to be his best man._

"_Stop calling her," he warned. "She doesn't want to talk to you."_

_I stood up casually and started to walk towards him. "What if I want to talk to her?" I asked._

_Sully just smiled. He smiled that smug smile that he used when he told me about his first time with her. And my reaction to that smile was exactly the same as it was back then. I wanted to throw up. I wanted to punch him until his smiling face was beaten to a pulp. I wanted to take out my gun and fire right between his eyes. Maybe I should have, because he then showed me the file he was holding in his hand. My eyes glanced over it, registering its meaning as I locked my gaze with him again._

"_A restraining order?" I asked incredulously. _

_He explained to me, "That means if you come near her apartment…" I interrupted him._

"_I work for the FBI; I know the boundaries of a restraining order. You know you can't file one on Bones' behalf, right?" His smile grew bigger as he pointed out that it was his name, not hers on the plaintiff side._

"_It's me you have to stay away from. And don't worry about seeing me here at work. See, I've put in a suggestion with Cullen for me to be the official liaison for the Jeffersonian, so I'll be spending all my time there from now on." I was never fond of the phrase 'if looks could kill,' but right now I was wondering if I glared at him hard enough, would he drop to the floor? Because that would solve so many problems._

_He continued, despite my not-so-effective death stare. "You see, you won't be able to see her any I spend all of my time with her now. Eating with her; planning our Wedding together; watching TV with her" that fucking smile was back when he said his next words. "Touching her…Fucki-"_

_I couldn't let him say his next words. I knew if they came out of his mouth, I would probably want to kill myself. It's bad enough knowing what he gets to do to her every night, but there is no way in hell I was going to let him burn that image into my mind. My body reacted immediately and next thing I knew his smug fucking face was colliding with my hard knuckles. He stumbled backwards, trying to turn to face the ground so as he could break his fall, only to have his ribcage crushed against the back of the chair. I doubted he broke anything, but I really didn't give a fuck. I started to approach him, to finish what I had started, when I felt a hand on my shoulder, holding me back from him. I turned to see Cullen._

"_That's enough Booth," he said gravely as I struggled free from his grip. He kept a firm hold on me until I eventually simmered down. Sully stayed bent over, clutching his ribcage, obviously winded. When he turned around, he looked at me angrily. As if he was the one who deserved to be angry. As if I hadn't spent sleepless nights thinking about Brennan. How she felt underneath me. How she moaned because of me. How I'd do anything to feel the same way again._

_Sully told Cullen that he'd be okay; that he still needed to talk to me privately, and that he'd yell if he needed anything. Cullen nodded curtly before exiting the room. I returned my attentions to Sully._

_There was something burning in my mind for years. Why I had chosen that time to mention it, I had no idea. Probably just to remind him of the undeserving bastard that he was._

"_Let me ask you something Sully," I enquired. "Why the hell did you leave in the first place? I mean, you had this gorgeous woman who was finally starting to trust you and who you fucking claimed to be in love with, and you sailed away. What the fuck possessed you to do that?" I smiled inwardly at the look of insecurity on his face, but that tiny moment of triumph was washed away once he scoffed, "You sound as if you know what it's fucking like to be with her."_

_I looked at Sully, his face growing wide in sudden realization as he looked at me closely. Shit._

"_When?" he asked, his voice half his usual volume. I stayed silent, squirming slightly at the intensity of his gaze._

"_When?" he asked again, more forcefully this time. When he didn't get an answer again, he asked "Was it while we were dating?" No response. "Was it while I was in the Caribbean?" Again, I gave him nothing. His eyes widened as a new theory dawned on him. "Was it during our engagement?" I could feel my own jaw twitch, and from the look on his face, he seemed to know what that meant._

"_You fucking bastard!" he spat. "WHEN?" he shouted as his eyes bulged angrily._

_I hung my head. There are times when he could be a complete asshole, but no-one really deserved this. Half-knowing something this colossal. I quietly mumbled "The night she told me."_

"_Say it fucking louder," he roared._

"_The night she told me, okay?" I said, my voice also raised as I lifted my head to look him in the eye._

_There was a moment of pure silence, the spine-tingling quietness. The calm before the storm._

_He lunged at me. Out of nowhere, he jumped towards me, his eyes burning with hatred and a certain animalistic look on his face. I quickly side-stepped to avoid the blow from the fist he had raised._

"_You bastard!" he roared before swinging at me again. I had only barely avoided it when he took another, impacting on my ribcage. I clutched it for a few seconds before remembering that there was a lunatic in the room who apparently intended to kill me. A couple more roars and punches from Sully and Cullen finally came in._

"_AGENT SULLIVAN!" He roared in a dominant type voice that reminded me of my principal back in high-school._

_Sully immediately stopped punching and sprang back slightly in surprise, still glaring at me. He immediately walked by me towards the door, stopping at Cullen._

"_If you'll excuse me sir, I'm going to take my lunch now," he said professionally before spitefully adding "To see my fiancé." I could feel the annoying shiver up my spine as he walked out the door._

END FLASHBACK:

"Temperance," I said, a hint of desperation in my voice. "I can explain-"

"AND you hit him!" she shouted.

"Listen, I didn't-"

"You didn't what, Booth? You didn't mean to try sabotage my relationship? You didn't realize what you were saying? Are you honestly trying to make up an excuse for the way you acted?" she said sharply.

"Will you just let me explain?"

"You told me that you tried to stay away," she continued, as if she never heard him. "You said that you tried to leave me alone, tried not to interfere. You lied to me Booth. You never stayed away, you did the best you could to ruin my marriage, and you know what? Congratulations! I hope you're fucking happy," she said before walking away.

I might have laughed, seeing her struggling to look angry while carrying six feet of material from her puffy dress, if my heart hadn't ripped completely apart because of her. I ran outside to catch up with her and once I got close enough, I grabbed her shoulder and span her around. I could see the tears streaming down her face and I knew that I was close to tears myself.

"Temperance, please don't do this. Don't run again," I pleaded. I wasn't sure if I could take it if she left again.

She paused, her face showing her conflict of emotions, before saying "Do me a favor and stay out of my fucking life, Booth" Her voice was raspy and heavy with tears as she wriggled from my grip and walked away. I watched her leave, knowing that now; there was no way I could get her back. But I still called after her, even after the point where I knew she could no longer hear me.

**I think you know by now what I want. But just in case, I'm going to repeat myself. Again and again. And again and again and again……**

**Please comment!!**


	6. Broken

**DO NOT get used to updates this quickly 'cause it ain't gonna happen.**

Angela could count on one hand the number of time she ever saw Brennan cry. But there was only one other time her best friend ever acted like this; and that was the time that Booth 'died.'

Two weeks ago, which was two days after her 'Wedding,' the entire team was gathered at the lab on Cullen's instructions. Angela knew immediately that it could not be good. Cullen never made any associations with squints unless it was bad news. But she never figured that they'd all be told that Booth had made a voluntary transfer to Florida. Everybody's eyes immediately snapped towards Brennan, all concerned faces to how she would react.

She stood there, her mouth slightly agape and her eyes shining, tears threatening to spill. Her entire body was frozen still. Even the rise and fall of her chest to show she was breathing had stilled. The entire lab was silent, everybody seemingly waiting for a hint of life from Brennan.

Eventually, there was the slightest quiver of her bottom lip before she closed her mouth. "Is that all the information you have? That he's transferred? He didn't mention why?" she asked.

"No," replied Cullen softly. "But he did give me this to give to you." He raised a hand, which was holding an envelope and gave it to Brennan. Angela could barely even register the writing on the front as "Temperance" before Brennan swiftly walked by everyone, looking at the front of the envelope and darting towards her office, slamming the door behind her.

There were a couple of seconds of awkward silence at the lab before Cullen finally said a polite "Goodbye," and hurriedly left.

Cam turned to face Hodgins. "You. Go down to the store down the corner and get a large bottle of Vodka. Not the cheap stuff. Also, maybe you should get some cookie-dough. And Ben and Jerry's. LOTS of Ben and Jerry's. I am going to arrange for Brennan to be put on an extended vacation and you," she said, turning to Angela. "Go see if she's okay. Don't let her spend tonight alone." Angela could see the sincere worry in Cam's face and felt an odd sense of admiration for her boss. She nodded curtly before going down the stairs and approaching Brennan's office.

She knew she couldn't enter yet. She looked through the glass walls at Brennan. She was reading the letter at her desk. By the way her eyes were going; Angela knew that she was reading the same line over and over.

She knew that if she went in now, Brennan would put her heart in a box and lock away all of her emotions so as Angela couldn't see. Angela crouched down and made sure she was unseen whilst looking at Brennan. Inside her office, Brennan put the letter down on the desk with a calm demeanor.

_Wait for it. _Angela thought as she watched her friend portraying the essence of professional. _Wait for it…….._

Finally, Brennan buried her face in her hands and started crying. Angela's heart was breaking as she seen her best friend shaking with uncontrollable sobs. She straightened up and walked towards her door, knocking very lightly before opening it slowly and cautiously entering. She looked at Brennan's face, red puffy eyes swollen with tears. Angela walked over to her and sat down, patiently waiting for Brennan to speak.

"It's my fault," she said sadly. "I drove him away. He's gone because of me." Fresh tears came down from Brennan's cheeks as she handed Angela the letter, which Angela noticed had a couple of ink-stains that weren't from Brennan's tears. Booth was crying as he wrote it. She accepted the letter and started to read.

_Temperance,_

_First, I need to let you know that I really do love you. Don't doubt that for a second. You'll be impossible to ever replace or forget, because I know that I never have or never will love someone the way I love you._

_It kills me to have to do this, but I can't be in the same State as you and have you hate me like this. You asked me to get out of your life, and you know that if I thought we could make it through this, I would have stayed. But I think for the first time, this is one obstacle we can't overcome, no matter how much I want us to._

_I know you hate me right now, but I just need you to know that I didn't tell Sully that we were together; he figured it out on his own. And I know that I was wrong to punch him, but I couldn't stand the way he was talking about you. I couldn't let him talk about you like that and do nothing. I don't know if any of this changes anything, I just needed you to know._

_I've set up somewhere in Florida. I think it's best for both of us if you don't know where. I'm now training other young aspiring FBI agents. Parker will be allowed to spend his summers here and I'm flying back to DC once a month for a couple of days to see him. Maybe one day, if we can get over this, we can have a coffee. Like old times?_

_It's going to be impossible to stop loving you, but I have to try. You deserve so much, Temperance. Don't forget that._

_I love you,_

_Booth._

Angela was slightly confused. He didn't tell Sully that they were together? When the hell were they together? But she quickly shrugged off this topic, knowing that she had much more important things to do.

She quickly got up and stood at Brennan's side, hugging and cradling her head as she cried on her shoulder, her sobs being muffled by Angela's sweater.

Now, two weeks later. Brennan's eyes were void of tears, but were still extremely puffy and red, with obvious dark circles underneath. Her face had lost its rosy glow and now was a dull shade of gray, making her look weary and tired. Her clothes now hung off of her thin and limp frame, the outline of her ribcage now visible through her shirt. Angela never gave up trying to convince her to take better care of herself, but her advice seemed to fall on deaf ears.

No-one dared to mention Booth's name anymore, for fear of being verbally abused, no matter how calmly Brennan spoke as she insulted them.

But that wasn't what Angela was worried about.

Angela had arrived at Brennan's house a couple of minutes before midnight, trying to get something…_anything…_ out of her. She knocked on Brennan's door, reciting a small speech she had memorized to allow her entrance into Brennan's home. When there was no answer, she knocked again. Still no answer. Her confusion tuned to slight anger. She was angry that her closest friend wouldn't talk to her, wouldn't even look her in the eye properly anymore. Another knock, louder this time, but still no answer.

_Fuck this_ she thought, pulling out her spare key. _I'm going in._

She slowly opened the door, peeking around and calling 'Bren?' She walked inside stepping cautiously into the apartment. She looked around, still calling Brennan's name, until she thought she heard something very quiet in the bedroom. She curiously walked over, pushing the slightly-open door ajar, and screaming loudly at the sight she saw.

Brennan lay there, battered, bruised and covered in her own blood on her bedroom floor.

**Aren't I horrible? I could choose to let her live or die, depending on the quantity of reviews!! Nah, I'm not that cruel! Or am I? No.**


	7. Run to you

**Okay, you guys wanted a quick update. I'll have another one up as soon as I can. Thank you all so much for your comments!**

Booth had finally made it back to his hotel room after a fairly infuriating day of work. Back in DC, humor was another way to get by at a Crime Scene, but today, when he was talking to the aspiring agents about identifying and locating victims, he had slipped in a small joke, to which a lot of people took offence. He was going to have to teach them that it's okay to find a way to get by, because if you don't, you're going to end up drained and broken.

He sat down on his bed, next to where he threw the morning paper, and started browsing through apartments. He saw one that caught his attention.

"Two bedroom, one bathroom apartment overlooking Daytona Beach." Sounded good. Parker could spend his summers in the second room. And Booth knew that Parker loved the beach. This could be good for him.

He felt a vibration in his pocket and he pulled out his cell-phone. There was a voicemail that he hadn't heard yet. He briefly wondered if it was one of the squints, but then remembered that they didn't have his new number. God, he missed them all…..especially her. In the past two weeks he doubted that he even got more than an hour's sleep per night because of how much he thought about her. He was constantly worried about her. It took all of his will-power every night to refrain himself from calling her. She probably wouldn't pick up anyway. Then he'd have himself awkwardly explaining to an answering machine why he called her.

He flipped open his phone and retrieved the message. The instant he heard his name, he knew it was Rebecca calling.

"Seeley, it's Becca. I left a voicemail because I haven't quite gotten used to the time difference. Don't worry, this isn't about Parker. He's fine. This is about Dr. Brennan. Please don't hang up; Angela just wanted you to know that Dr. Brennan is in the hospital. They're not sure what happened to her, they just know that she was found in her apartment unconscious and severely beaten. She has to get surgery to repair some internal bleeding, and Angela said that the… I think she used the word 'squints'… would appreciate it if you were there for when she wakes up. I'm sorry, Seeley. I know how much she means to you." There was a beep as the message ended, and Booth just sat there, frozen in horror, before re-playing the message again. After the second time, he called Cullen.

"Cullen"

"Hey, it's Booth."

"Booth, I take it you've heard the news," he said in a sympathetic voice.

"Yeah, I'm coming back to aid in the investigation."

"Booth, I don't think-"

"You don't have to think. All you have to do is say 'why thank you Booth, it would be a great help for you to come and assist us.'"

There was a pause before Cullen sighed. "Fine. Get on a plane and get back here. I'll explain the situation to my superiors."

"Thank you sir."

"Oh, and Booth?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry about Dr. Brennan."

Booth paused a bit in surprise. "Thanks……Cullen."

He hung up the phone and took a deep breath. So much for trying to keep her out of his heart. How did he not realize that she never really left?

… … … … …

He arrives at the hospital, close to running as he paced around to reach the waiting room. As he entered, he saw the squints. He looked at them all. Angela's head resting on Hodgins shoulder as they slept, and Cam sitting, resting her elbows on her knees and slumping her shoulders. She looked up once she heard Booth enter. She patted the seat beside her for him to come and sit down.

He sat beside her and looked at her. "Where is she? Is she alright? What happened?"

Cam looked at him, her tired eyes analyzing him. "You know, we disagree on a lot of stuff, but I think you and I had completely different ideas when it came to what was best for her."

He sighed. "Me leaving was best for her. It still is. Come on Cam, do you really think that we could have recovered from something like that?"

"I think you didn't even try, Booth. And now she's in there, battered and bruised. And you know what?" she asked, anger coming into her voice. "It's your fault." She got up to leave.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

She turned around. "I'm getting a coffee. And I'm going to see if I can track down one of these incompetent doctors and threaten some news out of them." With that she left, leaving Booth to come to terms with her words. Had it been his fault? He did make a promise to himself to protect her. He remembered when she was kidnapped by Kenton, and when he and Hodgins were in the car. He told Hodgins 'It was my job to protect her.' Just because they weren't partners, did that mean that protecting her wasn't still his job? He scrubbed his face. Cam was right. It was his fault. But now, here he was, trying to make a mends.

He saw Angela start to stir, which immediately evoked a response by Hodgins. Both of them looked at Booth with drowsy eyes, and Angela smiled softly.

"I knew you'd come," she said knowingly.

"Ange," he whispered as tears started to well in his eyes. "I've fucked up everything."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I left. She needed me and I just fucking walked out of her life."

Angela walked over to him, and patted his shoulder. "She needed us all Booth. In a way, we all fucked up. I should have tried harder to get her to open up. I should have tried to make her eat. Maybe if I had have insisted she went out for drinks with me she wouldn't have been there when whatever happened took place. Maybe she wouldn't have broken so many ribs if I made sure there was actually some meat on them. But no, I just sat back, hoping that she'd get better," tears were streaming down Angela's face. "What kind of friend just sits back and hope she gets better all by herself? I am such an idiot." Booth reached out and held her shoulder reassuringly, before drawing her into a hug as she cried on his shoulder.

Cam came rushing into the room, a disposable coffee-cup in her hand.

"I just spoke to the doctor. The surgery was a success. She's awake."

**See? Lots of people wanted another super-fast update, and look what happened! Want another one? You know what to do!**


	8. The aftermath

**I'm getting better with the updates! Although, I am neglecting my other stories, but I think that I am proudest of this one anyway.**

**Some people wanted a nice reunion of Booth and Brennan...I went a different way with it.**

**WARNING: This is my angstiest chapter to date. Prepare to hate me by the end of it.**

Angela, Hodgins and Booth immediately sprang to their feet and walked quickly out the door of the waiting room.

Cam stopped Booth before he left by placing her hand firmly on his shoulder. He turned around; ready to start an argument as to why he should go to see Brennan when he saw tears were starting to gather vehemently in her eyes. His face fell from anger to concern in an instant. There wasn't much in this world that could make Cam cry.

"The Doctor told me some news that he said would be best for a friend to tell Brennan, but I can't do it," she said in a shaky voice. "I think that it she should hear it from you. You owe her this at least."

His heart was pounding as she spoke. Hundreds of horrible situations went through his head in a flash, each one more and more terrifying.

"Just please tell me she's going to be okay," he pleaded with Cam.

"She will……well, physically she'll be fine if she keeps responding to her surgery…" she trailed off as tears rolled down her cheeks slowly.

He looked at her helplessly. "Camille, please…please just tell me," he begged.

Cam swallowed thickly. "When she was brought to surgery, they found something……"

* * *

He walked towards her hospital room, scrubbing his tired face with his hands. How the hell was he going to tell her this? How was she going to react to this news? As if he hadn't hurt her enough, now he had to tell her this? But Cam was right. He owed her this. She deserved to know, even if it was such bad news.

He entered the room and saw Angela and Hodgins at her bedside, blocking his view of her. He could hear them speaking to her, fussing over her and asking if she was okay. He could hear her response, her voice weak and raspy, but she still had the same can't-hold-me-down spirit. She insisted she was fine, and insisted that she didn't need any drugs, that she could recover without potentially harming her immune system. She also told them that they shouldn't have come, that they didn't need to worry about her. If it were any other situation, he would smile. She always was a fighter.

He moved closer, until Hodgins and Angela turned towards him, acknowledging his presence.

"Guys," he said sadly. "I need the room." They looked at his face, and he could see the worry there. They must have known that this was something serious. "Cam is in the waiting room," he added, before they left.

He looked down at Brennan. Her pale skin made the dark cuts and bruises stand out more. Some cuts had stitches; others just grazed her skin, like soft scratches. At her right temple, beside her tired eyes, was a bruise so dark it was almost black. Her arms mostly held scratches, and two fingers on her right hand had been bandaged together.

She looked up at him, the surprise on her face gradually turning to anger.

"Temperance," he began.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she said rudely.

"I'm here because you're hurt, and I'm not leaving until I find out what happened to you. But this isn't-"

"Booth, you can't just walk out of my life and leave me a letter, then walk back in just because I'm roughed up."

"Roughed up? You had internal bleeding, broken bones…you had to have surgery." He could hear his voice getting louder in frustration and he took a deep breath to calm himself down. "But that's not what I wanted to talk to-"

"I don't need your fucking pity, Booth so why don't you just get out," she spat.

"Temperance, listen. Let me say what I have to say. This isn't about me; it's about your surgery. Then, if you want, I'll leave and I'll never come back but…please. This is really important." His voice was starting to break. Brennan's face softened from her icy glare to one of fear.

"What happened? What went wrong?" she asked. Booth stayed quiet, looking at her helpless face and trying to find some way to say this.

"Booth; you're scaring me. Please," she said. "Tell me what happened."

He took a deep breath and held her hand as a single tear slided down his cheek. He looked from their hands to her face.

"When…when they were repairing your kidney, they found… a fetus," Booth could hear her breath hitch in her throat. "It had just entered its second trimester; it was too small for them to even determine if it was a boy or girl." He seen the surprise in her eyes, and he could feel her hands shaking. "I'm so sorry, Temperance." He said; his voice barely a whisper. "There was nothing they could do. The baby didn't make it." At his last words, Brennan started to cry silently, tears streaming down her face as she pursed her lips, shaking her head in denial. After a couple of seconds, you continued.

"I don't think you're up to it, but I was thinking that someone should probably call Sully. I mean, he deserves to know-"

"No," she said quietly. She stopped shaking her head and looked into his eyes again. "Booth, the baby wasn't Sully's. Sully can't have children." Her grip on his hand tightened, and Booth could feel his hands starting to shake as well as he looked at her.

"It was yours," she said, before letting out a loud sob. Fresh tears stung his eyes and now his entire body was shaking as he tried to suppress the sobs. She gave his hand a gentle tug and pulled herself up so as she was sitting better and she wrapped her arms around him, crying on his shoulder.

Her incident had weakened her, but Booth had never felt her hold on to him so tightly. He held her gently, trying not to hurt her. He usually shushed her, told her everything was okay, but he just couldn't find the right words to reassure her. So he just held her, let her cry and he tried to figure out something…_anything…_that would make this easier for her.

**Eh…Comment? I know it's angsty, but it's good angst. Right? Guys?**


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